This post is dedicated to and inspired by Hippie Cahier who wrote, “What’s Next?”.
~ . . ~
If I am in a public place, I will find a spot where I can be discrete. Then, I will do whatever it takes to locate the hair that is brushing against my arm, tickling my stomach, or moving up and down with every blink of my eye.
Strands of my hair seem to fall out on a regular basis. When the strands get caught in my shirts, skirts, bras, eye lashes, etc., I will not rest until I can locate the irritant and remove it. If it means I have to pull off my shirt to locate the sucker, I will.
After reading Hippie’s most recent post, I came to a realization. Actually, I had the realization months ago, but her post (and the hair caught in my shirt) created the perfect metaphor for me.
When I started blogging, nearly three years ago, my life was an irritant. It was. My marriage was in the crapper, I was deeply depressed, and suicide and divorce crept into my mind far too frequently. So, I wrote about it. After all, I’m a talker.
When a grain of sand irritates an oyster the oyster deals with the irritant by creating a pearl. My life was the grain of sand, and I dealt with the irritant by creating the blog. I realize comparing my blog to a pearl is a bit extreme, but like a pearl-life is precious, and my blog helped me write my way back into that realization and fact.
This blog was therapy for me. I expressed myself with no holds barred, even at the chagrin of my husband at times. Through this blog I wrote about my quirks and irks, and I met others with their own quirks and irks. I joined blogging challenges and participated in group postings, and I struggled with writing for me vs. writing for stats.
At the end of 2011, I had the bright idea to take part in a “Picture a Day” for the year 2012. I committed to posting a new picture every day for all 366 days of the year. The first 30 days I enjoyed the commitment. I found it fun looking for the perfect shot to share the next day. By day 150, the project was becoming more challenging than fun, and by day 200, I found myself wishing the rest of the 166 days away. Quickly.
Though there is more to it than posting a picture a day, the photo project is the proverbial straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back.
Forgive me, because I know I’ve shared the following with you prior to today. One of Rob’s favorite hobbies is welding, and he is an excellent welder. I’ve tried encouraging him to open his own welding shop. Rob has no intention of opening his own welding shop, because Rob doesn’t want his hobby to become work.
Rob is a smart man.
Writing was a hobby for me. Writing was an escape for me. Writing was my therapy. Lately, writing and picture taking has become work. My hobby, escape, and therapy have taken a turn in a direction I find burdensome rather than relaxing.
Lately, I’ve tried convincing myself with various reasons why I haven’t written many posts. I’ve told myself that the kids, my work, and my life in general have kept me from writing. I’ve told myself that the voices in my head that so desperately want to come out and get released onto paper are interrupted by phone calls, homework, projects, obligations, etc. But I’m kidding myself. I’ve never had a problem expressing myself when I had something to share. If I want to write about something, I will make time to write about it. Period.
The reality these days is that I don’t want to write. I’m tired. The fun is gone, and the writing feels more like work. Plus, I have a new outlet, a fresh outlet. With another friend/blogger, I created an outlet that lets us have a conversation with one another, as we share our differing opinion.
I’m not looking to put an end to dialogue; I’m just looking to take back my hobby.
I’ve committed to Project 366, and I will keep that commitment. You will still find a new picture posted here every day, throughout 2012. And there is a rumor Blogdramedy is doing another Festivus holiday casting call, which I will more than likely answer. Aside from the pictures and casting call, I am putting my blog in sleep-mode indefinitely.
I will continue to read other blogs, comment, and stalk dance like no one is watching. I thank each and every single visitor that came to my neighborhood, pulled up a chair, and chatted with me. You all motivated me, and you helped make this experience a rewarding one for me. Sincerely I say to all of you, “Thank you”.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to see ‘what’s next’.
.:.
Shore Acres left a link to this video in the comment section of Hippie’s post. I found it too brilliant not to put it on mine.
Lenore's Thoughts Exactly 
ZZZZZ A well deserved hibernation—I always enjoy your posts whether they are part of your Project 366 or posts!!! Glad I found you (and Andy) and look forward to reading what you have to offer again after it is no longer a chore and is back to being a hobby!!! 🙂
Thank you, Beth Ann. I am so happy you took Andy on an adventure. Thank you for participating in that project. I’ll continue to visit you, and I appreciate you stopping by to see the pictures. We’ll see what happens next.
Only good things ahead for you–no doubt!!!! Happy to have found you!!! Andy still has a huge place in my heart! And his pic is on my fridge!
I’m glad you will still be around. As you know, I recently had to stop blogging because of an energy crisis (my own). I missed it, but was surprised somehow, that life just kept on without my written offerings. I’m try to get back, but like you, I am finding it to be a bit of work…I do need to write, though, so I’m not likely to close up shop.
You were one of my very first commenters, Lenore, and you were so welcoming. You are a source of great inspiration to many – you are upbeat, contemplative at times, and so open and honest. I’ll continue to enjoy your photos – thanks for sharing them.
Whatever is next for you – and I’m hoping that your endeavors are rewarding – I wish you the best always.
Thank you, Katy. When I clicked ‘publish’ on this post, I immediately felt a weight lifted off my shoulders. I am confident I’ll come back when something hits me, but I am no longer stressing over finding something to hit me. I’m either inspired or I’m not. I can’t force it anymore. Rest assured, I’m still following you. When you feel inspired to post – I’ll be there to read. That’s the other thing – I can read without worrying about putting something out there.
Thanks again, Katy.
Well, gosh. First, I hope it’s not my hair. The FormerBossofMe (FBoM) used to hate finding my stray hairs were everywhere. 😉
Obviously, I understand your decision, but maybe you do just need a breather. A full year of daily posting is a lot for a busy working mom. I do enjoy your pictures and your stories and the occasional chance to shout, “Elvis!” at my screen.
Since we have similar music taste, I have two things to share.
One is already posted on my “Hippie Cahier: The Musical” page. Antje Duvekot has a song called “Pearls,” which I believe has an acceptably literary use of a bad word that I won’t reprint here. Your oyster/pearl line reminded me of that. http://wp.me/P1wS2d-1D3 .
The other is David Wilcox’s “Sex and Music (Sacred Ground),” which I wanted to work into a post about blogging but never did.
Rob’s resistance to making work out of his hobby reminds me of the song’s line, “First you do it for love, but then, you do it with friends. As soon as you do it for money, right there’s where the innocence ends.” http://davidwilcox.com/index.php?category=Underneath&display=347&page=songs
Peace. Love. Elvis! 🙂
I appreciate your wealth of music knowledge, Hipster. David Wilcox sounds very familiar – I can’t place him, though. I’ll have to do more looking when I get to the office. (Makes sense right? Researching music while one is supposed to be working?)
Thanks for your comments. I promise to include at least two more pictures that will trigger an “Elvis!” moment for you. I see that pooch weekly, and she loves getting her picture taken.
I am a new fan of Antje. Thanks for introducing her to me. I like that she plays with Ellis Paul on ocassion, too. Perhaps I’ll see her in Decatur at some point.
And again I say thank you for the post you wrote. As silly as it sounds, I read your post and felt I was given permission to come clean with my thoughts. You didn’t give me permission, per se – but if you could do it, then I could do it, too. Weird? Yes, well – that’s me. 🙂
(((((hugs))))) I’m sad to see THIS go, but I’ve seen you pull away and I’ll still have US. Plus, I know where you live.
See ya at the co-blog!
You have said things in this post that I didn’t know, Lenore. You are right, when fun becomes work it’s time to take another path. Yes, Rob IS a smart man. Whatever you decide, I wish you all the best.
Blessings ~ Maxi
Thank you muchly, Maxi. I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders, knowing readers are in the loop with my mindset. Now I don’t feel the pressure to think of something new to post. I’ll enjoy this downtime, and perhaps I’ll find the urge again soon. In the meantime, the pictures will continue and I’ll continue writing with my friend, Kim.
Enjoy your break, but most of all, enjoy your life. You’ll be missed!
Thanks, SDS. You should get with Blogdramedy and participate in the Festivus fun. I am certain you’d create some winners. Hope to see you there!
Every one needs a blog break. I take one whenever life gets too interesting not to pay attention. *grin*
You may be back; you may not. We will miss you…just not enough to hound you or call out the dogs. We’ll leave you to make a new pack with what is to come. But occasionally we will lick our wounds and howl for Lenore.
See you over the holidays. 🙂
Looking forward to the holidays, BD. The break will give me time to really blow it away during the Festivus festivities.
Go out while you’re on top is what I always say. 🙂
I totally agree…when it (anything really) starts to feel uninspiring and it’s more like drudgery than fun, it’s time to hang up the “gone fishin'” shingle.
I hope to see you lurking around the blogosphere from time to time. Good luck on whatever is next for you!
Does this mean I’ve finally made it to the top? (smile) I will forever lurk, Jackie. No worries.
Thank you for the well wishes.
I can certainly understand where you’re coming from, Lenore. I’ve come close to taking a long extended break many times (and almost quitting entirely) Sometimes, keeping up with the pace can be draining.
You were one of my very first commenters. as well. Many times when I wanted to quit, you’d leave a kind comment and were very encouraging. Thank you for that. May you enjoy your break, however long it may be. (you never know…you might come back!)
Thank you, Darla. I’ve known you the longest, I think. You’ve encourage me, too. I suspect I’ll return. Eventually.
Good luck, Lenore. Blogging has helped you find the ‘next’, that’s wonderful, isn’t it?
I like the song shoreacres, left, too!
Thank you, Priya. It is wonderful.
This is a very tricky thing to respond to… because on the one hand I’ll miss what you’ve been doing over here so much, Ms. D.
But on the other… I completely understand how you feel. I post much less frequently than you do, and I still get all stressed out over it. If I’m working on a long-term project I find myself in a panic looking for ‘in-the-meantime’ things to post. Then I worry those things might not be up to par. Or I wind up censoring what I do (or don’t do) because I don’t want to offend anyone, etc… it can get to be a drain… which is sad, because it’s meant to be fun!
Anyway, I feel good just knowing you’ll be around… and the main thing is to do what is best for you! You deserve nothing less!
🙂
You are as good with words as you are with art, Robert. I greatly appreciate you visiting me. You’ve always left me with smiles. Here’s to seeing more of your creations, Robert. No pressure. 🙂
You’ve done much better at the Project 366 than I did. I petered out around 100. I think you’re absolutely right about doing something like this because its FUN. Last time I checked, none of us were getting paid for this, so why WOULD you do if it felt like a chore? I’d mentioned that I’d noticed my post-rate had dropped off and I think it’s for similar reasons.
I will say though that through each “phase” of my blogging life I’ve met really interesting people. People who have “stuck” — whether it continues to be through blogs, or social media. And I am super-grateful for that.
Know what, Steve? I’m hoping I can start doing Drabbles again. I looked forward to Fridays and Drabbles. I’m not rushing into it again, but I like the thought of having Fridays back.
And, I’m super-grateful for those that have ‘stuck’, too. Here’s to continued stalking through social media! We have a kick-butt group, too. 🙂
When you get inspired to write, I’ll be here waiting. 🙂 Enjoy your new season, but you HAVE to keep us up-to-date on those boys we have grown to love, like birthdays and holidays. Promise?
Thanks, Patti. Rest assured, as long as this photo project is in play, you’ll see shots of the boys. Thanks for not getting tired of seeing them.
Thanks for this post Lenore. With so many others I shall miss you, but I do understand. In fact, I am about to take another longer rest from blogging. I too am finding the need to come up with something different each day very taxing and what was fun has become boring. Take care and look after those boys. Hope to see you back some time. 🙂
Thank you, Judith. I found trying to think of something to write and keeping up with the pictures, left little time for reading. I miss the reading, Judith. I look forward to catching up on my blogging friends, like you- regardless of how frequent posts are posted. 🙂
This makes me sad, but I understand. When i took on the postaday2011, I felt the same way. I only made it to May. You’ve done wonderful, your writing has become nothing short of excellent, and I’ll miss reading you. But do make sure you keep writing, somewhere, sometimes please??
Thank you, Angel. I’m impressed with how much you’ve been able to write while having a new little one in the house. Babies do make for great inspiration though, eh?
Lenore, I am not at all surprised that you’ve drawn a line in the sand and had to back away from something in your life. I’ve long wondered how you could possibly find the time/energy/motivation to post a photo every day AND to actually write regularly as well.
I participated in the 365 Project for 2 years. It was fun and I really enjoyed the friendships I made along the way, but after a while it became one more have-to-do task, like brushing my teeth and cleaning the catbox. I felt a huge relief when I stepped away from that.
BUT…I am sorry you are stepping away from blogging and I do hope it is a brief respite. Perhaps at the end of your photo-a-day project, you will regain the energy and desire to blog again. I’ve enjoyed seeing the photos of your adorable family. But I will sincerely miss your posts.
Enjoy a well-deserved break, my friend.
Two years? Wow. I tip my hat to you.
Thank you very much for your words of encouragement, Linda. I am grateful you’ve visited me time and time again. I am fairly confident my desire, energy, and ideas will return eventually. In the meantime, I look forward to reading what you have to share. Thank you, again, Linda.
You are wise to pay attention to your changing self and to create space for whatever is to come next. There are many ways to utilize your creative talents and stepping away for a short while or for a long time will likely spark endeavors you have percolating inside your head. As others have said, your wit, warmth and writing pizazz will be missed. But not forgotten. See you when I see you, Lenore. Take Care.
Thank you, Stacia. I always find your words inspiring and comforting. I am grateful for all your visits.
Heed the heart and peace will follow. Of that, I’m sure.
I will be here when you return 🙂
MJ
Thank you, MJ. My head is still churning out ideas, so we’ll see when something surfaces. In the meantime, I’m enjoying the peace knowing I don’t ‘have’ to post.