The Offspring of my Other Obsession

I am a woman with many obsessions. My main obsession is ice cream, but I am not writing about ice cream, today. Instead, I am writing about my other obsession and my other obsession’s offspring.

Now, before I get to the other obsession and the other obsession’s offspring, I want to remind you of the fact that I am a fan of Dancing with the Stars. Go ahead, judge me. I stand behind my random fandom. In fact, I proudly admitted to being a fan here, in this post. (Go Sugar! Go Sugar!)

I also want to let you know that the ‘Stars’ participating in this season of Dancing with the Stars were announced. Stick with me on this, please.

One of the stars included in this season of Dancing with the Stars is Chaz Bono. Chaz! Chaz Bono!

When I found out Chaz was a contestant on Dancing with the Stars, I squealed like a school girl. I did. Because, my friends, my obsession is Cher. Ack! Cher! Love her! And, I am certain Cher will be in the audience to watch her son perform. Who knows – Cher may even sing on the show. Ack! I love Cher.

So, the morning I heard Chaz was going to be on the show, I sent an email to two of my sisters, whom are also Dancing fans. They, too, openly admitted their Cher obsession. (It must be genetic.),people,news,chastity-bono-daughter-of-sonny-and-cher-changes-her-sex

My sisters and I chatted back and forth about Cher and Chaz. I was surprised to find out Chaz is 42yrs old. My age. When I think back to my kid years and watching Sonny and Cher, I see myself as older than Chaz (then Chastity). I never dreamed we were the same age. S/he was so young then! I guess that means I was young, too.

How is it I have memories of such an early age? Powerful memories. My obsession with Cher started with the Sonny and Cher show. I wanted to be Chastity.

Now, when I see Chaz, I see – so clearly – the face of the little kid held by either Sonny or Cher. I remember how shy Chaz was on stage, her little face grimacing a sweet smile. Chaz still has that sweet smile. He still has the glow of his Mom and Dad. The only difference between Chaz now and Chaz then is the fact that the grimace is gone.

Chaz found himself.

Chaz had the courage to withstand the peanut gallery, withstand the judges and critics. Chaz was true to Chaz. Chaz was true to his being. He made it happen, and his sweet smile is proof he is where he needs to be. He is where he wants to be.

Why can’t others accept that? Why can’t people leave other people alone? Perhaps those who are judging and those who are critical are jealous of Chaz’s courage? I’m not suggesting these judges and critics are gay, lesbian or transgender and not willing to admit it. I’m merely saying, perhaps they are jealous of the fact that Chaz did what he wanted to do without getting bogged down by the backlash. Maybe these judges and critics wanted to be circus performers or shave their head and cover it with a tattoo, but they feared the backlash. I don’t know.


What I do know is Cher is proud of her son. Regardless of how Cher reacted when Chaz first talk to her about how he was feeling, Cher still loved and supported him.

Keep in mind, being shocked doesn’t mean one doesn’t accept. Every parent has a story for their child playing out in their own mind. When the story is altered, a parent is likely to be shocked, at least to a certain extent. But again, being shocked is not nonacceptance.

Being shocked is OK.

Lashing out at differences? That’s unacceptable. The hate that is filling social networks, entertainment columns, etc. is shameful. Shameful and unacceptable.

Truth be told, you are different, too. And, maybe you hide what is different about you, because you fear you would be judged. Well, what would happen if you stopped judging others? What would happen if you stopped pointing out the differences of others? What would happen? Imagine the ripple effect….


Dear Chaz,
I know you are a guy, now. More power to you for embracing the man within you. Still, I hope you will forgive me. You see, whenever I look at a picture of you, I see the sweet, little baby face of a girl I once watched on television. I watched you on stage with your Mom and Dad. So forgive me, because you still have the sweet, little baby face – even if that baby face was born a girl. (Plus, you look like your Mom. Ack! I love her!)
Now go kick some dancing butt, and bring home that mirror ball trophy!
Hugs (assuming you don’t mind. If you do – then just regards),

P.P. S.
Dear Cher,
I love you. I cried when you came out on stage during one of your concerts in Atlanta. In fact, I think I cried throughout your entire performance. Cher, I used to roll my eyes at those silly fans who broke down in tears when they would see the object of their fandom. Yet, when I saw you walk out on stage – I became that silly fan. And, if I were to ever meet you – as silly as it may be – I would cry. Well, first I would get embarrassed and turn bright, bright, BRIGHT red. Then, I would cry.
You – your appearance on TV and in film – your songs – your outfits – you – all of it – got to me; you still get to me. I wonder… do you wear socks with sandals? Outrageous, right? I rock the look. I do. I’m thinking you could, too.
Hugs, (See above for note about hugs to Chaz.)

P.P.S. I hope to see you on Dancing with the Stars (or in person – whatever works.)

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34 thoughts on “The Offspring of my Other Obsession

  1. I wanted to be Chastity too in the 70’s! I loved the Sonny and Cher show and felt so sad when they divorced.

    And I think you nailed it – intolerance = fear.

    I love the way Cher supports her children regardless. The world would be a better place if all mothers did the same.

  2. Firstly, HA you’re older than me. I could just end it at that but NO I have even BETTER news. News that will break your heart into millions of pieces. News more hurtful than GG’s love for me. Wanna know what it is?

    My friend is one of the singers on ‘Dancing.’ Yup. There’s a black lady who wears a funny thing on her head and then there’s Beverly. Beverly Staunton. You can Google her. I call her Bev. We’re that close. When we went camping together – her family, her sister-in-law’s family (another close friend) and mine – this summer (because we’re good friends and she sings on ‘Dancing), Noah asked if we could go to the show this season. She’s getting us tickets. Yup. Me and Noah and probly Hot Joe. I’m not POSITIVE, but I’m guessing it will probably be the very same day that Cher shows up, and she’ll probably take one look at Noah and want to put him in movies. Then she’ll introduce us to Chaz and invite us for dinner. Cher, Chaz, Chaz’s significant other, Beverly and us. And we’ll all talk about equality and gay rights. And then Cher will sing for us.

    Then Cher will come camping with us next summer.

    The end.

    P.S. You are so jealous right now I can hear the tears hitting the floor from here.

  3. “I was born in the wagon of a travelling show … ” like you, I grew up watching that sweet faced baby girl on Sonny & Cher and no, I never missed an episode, pretty sure of it. I don’t regularly watch DWTS but I do love the glitz, glamor and wardrobe. I might have to watch now that Chaz is on … cool!! Cheers, MJ 🙂

    1. PS – we saw Cher at an outdoor concert in Houston. Fun concert, opened by Cyndi Lauper, and really interesting crowd. We left when some started squirting ketchup at each other ..and ruined the experience for the rest of us. MJ

      1. Cher and Cyndie Lauper? Interesting. Equally different women – for certain. Equally different. Funny oxymoron. Anywho…. the ketchup thing? Ridiculous. I’m sorry they ruined it for you guys.

    2. “Gypsies tramps an thieves – but every night the men would come around…. and lay their money down….”
      I can’t imagine I missed a show either, MJ. It was truly the highlight of my night. I hope you’ll check out DWTS a little more regularly this season. I would like to get a campaign going to keep Chaz on the show as long as possible… if only to ensure my Cher fix. (smile) Yaaay!

    1. Amen, Oma. You nailed it. With so few words, too. There are people who accept the right to be who they are but they deny it to the people they are afraid of. Nicely put! Sadly accurate.

  4. I agree with your post whole-heartedly. I would like to add one thing…and I’m not a DWTS fan and only watch occassionaly, but I hope that Chaz wipes the floor with Nancy Grace. Yep, I said it. Not being judgemental or anything, but she annoys the crap out of me! Go Chaz!

    1. Go Chaz! Go Chaz! Go Chaz! Dance your butt off. Dance your butt off!
      P.S. I will email you on the nights the show is on and it is time to vote. You WILL vote for Chaz, Andre HT. Oh yes. You will vote for Chaz.

  5. She says it all in “This is a different kind of love song, Dedicated to everyone”. Cher was/is always inclusive. “Half breed” showed it again. And even after she and Sonny split up I felt
    “If love was ever true, I know it was with you, Cause you touch my soul and…You stay with me forever” was sung to him. It was very moving to not only see Cher at Sonny’s funeral,but to hear her speak as well. He was always with her be it through her children or not. It made me sad that they broke up…I felt they were meant for each other. At his eulogy she said something like it being “the most important thing I’ve ever done in my life”. Cher has style; Cher has class…always very true to herself.
    I loved their show…he was funny, she was glamorous wearing the perfect thing to wow us all.
    I like “So You Think You Can Dance” and I’ll be rooting for Chaz on DWTS. Good for you for writing this.

    1. Georgette, Cher’s eulogy to Sonny was so incredibly moving. The sincerity – the honesty – the vulnerability. Not that I would expect anything less from Cher, still seeing her – hearing her – I hope Sonny was able to see it. I really do. And, I do remember her saying that it was the most important thing she had done in her life. Goodness – reading your comment made me teary-eyed, and thinking about it makes me teary-eyed.
      It’s no wonder Chaz found the confidence to go his own way … his Mom (and Sonny) blazed the trail. So cool. So very cool.
      Thanks for reading. I’m glad you enjoyed it.

  6. I was actually listening to the radio in the car a few days ago when the announcers kept talk about Chastity, Chastity, her, Chastity, etc. They only occasionally used the name “Chaz.” Words like “him” and “he” were absent from the equation altogether. I asked Ba.D., “Why can’t they just refer to him for who he is now?” I don’t remember what Ba.D.’s answer was, but I mulled that over for the rest of our drive.

    I can’t remember if you’ve ever watched Buffy. If you haven’t, there’s a scene at the beginning of season three that’s a perfect reflection of your sentiment about being shocked to start. I don’t remember the exact dialogue, but Buffy’s mom says something to the effect of, “You didn’t give me time to understand!”

    Sometimes I wish it could be faster to reach that point, but I feel like it’s fair to expect/allow a little adjustment time, too. (I hope Li’l D sees this much earlier than I did!)

    1. I still fumble a bit when I talk about Chaz. As long as I use his name, I’m good. But if I see his face – I swear, I flash back to him as a kid, so I may slip and say her. His smile is the exact same. He really is attractive – he takes after his Mom, though he has his Dad’s eyes. (Yeah, I know – I’m obsessed.)

      I am starting to watch Buffy (thank you Netflix!). I’m still on season 1, but I am certain – now that we’ve had this ‘conversation’, the episode you mentioned will stand out. And honestly Deb – it’s not so much about understanding – it is merely about accepting. Accepting can come pretty quickly – if we let it.

      1. I love the distinction you’ve drawn here. It’s true, isn’t it? Acceptance is different than understanding, and we needn’t understand to accept the people we love as they are. With, perhaps, a little bit of lag time, depending on how surprising/etc. the “as they are” is perceived, at first.

        Did I mention you are wonderful? You are. FYI.

    1. No! I was a deprived child. I did not have the Cher doll. However, I did have every 45 Cher released. Sang the songs using my hairbrush as my microphone. I think I sounded just like her, too. 🙂

  7. Well I’ll be! I’m not a fan of Dancing with the Stars, I don’t even know what it is. I’m probably closer to Cher’s age than to Chaz’s age. And I had no idea that Chastity (I knew who she was) had become Chaz. Where in the world have I been living? What boulder did I just crawl out from under? Thanks for this education.

    I love that you separate shock from disapproval. How very true that is. Shock would be the natural reaction of any friend or relative upon learning that a person they’d always thought of as one way, turns out to be quite the opposite way. Yes. Shock is valid. Judgement and disapproval are counterproductive and dangerous.

    I’m glad I stuck with you on this one, because it is an important post.

    1. Dare I say, Linda, you are out of the loop because you are busy living your life, whereas I am glued to the television and internet. *sigh* I’m not proud – just obsessed. (smile) Glad I was here to educate you with the important things in life.

      And thank you – sincerely. I appreciate you catching the bit about shock vs. approval. There is a huge difference, and just because someone is taken aback with the news is not a sign of nonacceptance. I know, I am repeating myself. Sorry. Thank you for sticking with me on this post, and thank you for commenting. If you feel like slumming it once and awhile… you can find the show online – – once the season starts. Sept. 12th, I think. (P.S. Vote for Chaz!)

  8. “Truth be told, you are different, too. And, maybe you hide what is different about you, because you fear you would be judged. Well, what would happen if you stopped judging others? What would happen if you stopped pointing out the differences of others? What would happen? Imagine the ripple effect….”

    Well said, Lenore! I don’t watch DWTS, but Go, Chaz, go! imagine if only we could celebrate each other with respect for our individuality?! And to realize that we are all more similar than different. Why choose fear? Acceptance and love, that’s all we ALL want in this world and we all deserve nothing less.

  9. I can’t say that I’ve ever even watched DWTS. I have nothing against it but it never quite grabbed me, which is surprising given how much I love to dance and watch dancing.

    Cher, however, I luuhrve. I had a Sonny and Cher album I used to play so much that it got all scratched and faded. There was one song, “Little Man” – I think it was the middle song on Side A – that I used to sing around the house all the time. I remember watching the show sometimes but not too many details have stayed with me.

    After a bad breakup several years back, Cher was featured several times on a playlist of angry grrrrls and diva anthems that I put together to keep myself sane. She’s awesome, and her acceptance of Chaz just solidifies that status!

    1. I ‘luuhrve’ how many Cher fans have appeared here. When I was younger, I was picked on for liking her. Now, I shout it from the rooftops! Well, OK – not really. But, I blog about it. (smile)
      Thanks for visiting, L.

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