Oh lord. Here I go again, eh? Perhaps I should have warned you? Well see, several months ago a friend of mine provided me some feedback on my blog. She felt as though I apologized too much within my blog, either about my topic or my point of view. And, being the smart gluteus maximus, I couldn’t help but apologize to her for lacking a backbone. So, let it come as no surprise that I am – once again – offering an apology for the information I am sharing today.
“Fifty-two.” Mum answered.
Prior to calling my Mom, I called one of my sisters. Apparently, she had asked Mum the same question at some point, because she shared the same information with me. However, my sister didn’t get the added information about how Mum probably hit perimenopause in her mid to late 40s. And this, my devoted – or the now formerly devoted – readers is the topic of the day.
Shall I pause here a moment to allow readers to click elsewhere at this point and time? How’s that? Everyone else good? Okay, great. Moving along …
Perimenopause. I honestly believe I am walking into the phase of perimenopause. And, I fear the new level of crazy I am starting to face. Though I am not 100% sure I have officially stepped into perimenopause, the changes I am experiencing as of late cannot be ignored.
First, I am nearly a week late. My monthly cycle has always been on schedule, give or take a day in either direction. Never, during my non-pregnant days, have I gone a week over the expected start date. Never. And no. I am not pregnant. I took a pregnancy test on late day number three. Plus, sadly, my boobs are as flat as ever. No indication of the familiar bigger boobs for baby.
Second, my face is becoming flushed throughout the day for no apparent reason. When I blush, which I do easily, my face becomes vibrant red. Vibrant. Anyone and everyone who has seen me blush will nod their head enthusiastically in agreement that my face turns vibrant red. As they read this section, they may even have uttered out loud, “It does!” Well, though my face doesn’t become as vibrant red as it does when I am blushing, the fact remains that I am becoming flushed throughout the day – every day. It doesn’t feel like a hot flash, though certainly, if you were to feel my face when flushed, it feels hot.
Third, and most important, my mood is bad. Really bad. Wait. Now my mood is good. Wait. Nope. My mood is bad. Definitely bad.
In my early twenties, I battled anger issues. Happily (unlike the sadly flat boobs), I have greater control with regards to my anger issues. I still get mad, but my mad is a normal mad. I mean, I’m not the only one who gets mad and has to slam the door three times in a row, right? Okay, maybe not. Honestly though, I have come a long way with my anger issues. It’s been a long time since I’ve channeled Dr. David Banner from ‘The Incredible Hulk’ and uttered “Don’t make me angry. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.” But, I admit, my ‘mad’ seems to be intensifying.
So, what is going on with me now? Am I truly experiencing perimenopause, which is affecting my monthly cycle and moods? Or, am I late this month simply because I am in the midst of a stressful patch within my home and work life? Stress is a powerful little buggah. Stress could be preventing my menstrual cycle, as well as reducing my already short fuse. Then again, a change in my sleep pattern could be the source of my delayed cycle and irate state. My second job has certainly affected my sleep pattern. I can’t say for certain what is happening; something seems to be brewing, and I do not think it is a baby.
Be prepared, just as I used this blog to help me work through issues within myself and my marriage, I will use this blog to help me work through this newest – er – adventure? May the writing help me hold on to my sanity, while also keeping our doors and door jams safe.
If you have any suggestions, aside from me being committed, please feel free to share. Just don’t make me angry. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.