Tag: Life

Gentlemen, Start your engines!

~ Lenore Diane ~ Leave a comment

Please note: This blog was started on Monday April 26th.

It begins today, and it will run for the next four to six weeks. Swimming lessons Monday – Friday from 11:10 until 11:30, admission process for Montessori school, putting 25hrs into my paid job, various dental/doctor appointments and maintaining the chores in and around the house. As I drove the boys to Suzann’s this morning, I was going over the chaos beginning today. Seems this is a good example of what summer will bring, when the kids actually do start school and follow the school-year calendar. Happily, I still have a year before that happens.

On Sunday, I went to luncheon for women at our church. The purpose of the luncheon was to make sure the women knew what type of groups and activities took place within the church, specifically for women. In addition to the rundown of various woman’s groups, we heard Connie Smith speak. And, as I listened to Connie’s story, it was another reminder that we all live a life full of chaos and challenges.

The chaos of this week and the weeks ahead seems trivial in the shadows of Connie’s story. But, I am not Connie, and though I learned something from her story and took with me a refreshed mindset, the reality of my life is the only reality I know. I mention Connie and her story, because as I write about my challenges, I understand there are others out there with bigger challenges. Plus, knowing others are struggling, helps me keep my things in perspective.

I tried to find my Super Woman outfit Sunday night, prepping for the weeks ahead. In my search, I found Charlie’s wubba nub, one of Joe’s puzzle pieces, two quarters and a slice of toast. [Don’t ask.] I’m not sure where I left my Super Woman outfit. Maybe that is why I am having a hard time keeping everything afloat. Surely, once I find the outfit, I’ll be back on track and invincible. Plus, I look really hot in the Super Woman outfit. Though, honestly, when I am bloated, the outfit is much too restrictive.

I have started my engine, and this week has me running in high gear. I’m enjoying the chaos for the most part; because, when I don’t have things pressing, I tend to procrastinate to the point of complete avoidance. Plus, it is easier for me to keep away from spontaneous snacking, when I am busy with life. As is often the case for me, snacking is frequent while idling. Although, snacking while stressed is another habit of mine. Here’s hoping I continue to find the fun amidst the chaos, and the Ben & Jerry’s stays at the grocery store.

So, I started this post on Monday, as I indicated. And today? Yes, today is Wednesday April 28th. Seems the busy schedule leaves little time for blogging. Rest assured, I have managed to stay up-to-date on emails, Facebook, Woot.com and shirt.woot.com. We all have our priorities, eh? I have also squeezed in a movie via Netflix, playtime with the boys, multiple loads of laundry and . . . Well, I am sure I accomplished other non-scheduled tasks. And once again, my blogging is being cut short, as it is time to pick up the boys and take them to swim class. Once swim class is over, I will need to tend to the vacuuming. I don’t think it is a good sign, when the carpet resembles a hiking trail.

The Myth of being Balanced

~ Lenore Diane ~ Leave a comment

I confess, as I become stressed while embarking on the journey of putting my oldest in school and prepping for the financial sacrifices that are ahead of us, I just ate an entire pint of Ben & Jerry’s Phish Food. Seriously. In one sitting. Yes, I just finished eating an entire pint of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream. Some folks exercise when they are stressed. Me? I make quick runs to the grocery store, sing Richard Marx songs and eat ice cream (among other items of the junk food family). Oh, and I cut my hair. I am so glad I am normal. Or – wait. Is it abnormal? Whatever.

Entering this new phase of the school years is yet another balancing act of life. Of course, In my opinion, balancing is an ‘act’. It is a literal act that plays out on one’s stage of life, complete with lights and cameras. Aside from balancing a ball on your nose or finding balance while walking a tightrope, ‘balance’, as it is referred to by multi-tasking Moms and Dads, does not exist. And, trying to find the mythical ‘balance’ only makes one feel more out of balance. (Oh. Eating an entire pint of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream puts your body out of balance, too. Sorry, I digress. Again.)

My life is pretty sweet now. I find I have time to tackle the tasks that need to be tackled. Ironically (not), I seem to lack the motivation to tackle the tasks. Moreover, when I tackle the tasks with little to no scheduling conflicts, it is easy to buy into the myth of being balanced. However, throw in some real life consisting of last minute changes, impromptu doctor visits, spontaneous car mishaps and a case of the Chicken Pox, and it becomes clear that the thing called ‘balance’ is best used when talking about ball or circus tricks.

Next week, and the four to six weeks that follow, will surely solidify my belief that the term ‘balance’, when applied to multi-tasking Moms and Dads, is a myth. While working, making it to various appointments, keeping the house stocked and cleaned, I will be taking my boys to swimming lessons 5 days a week for the next four to six weeks, depending on how fast they learn. Their classes are 10 minutes long, starting at 11:10 a.m. and 11:20 a.m. Though the time at the pool will be short, relatively speaking, it will create a ripple effect each day, which will make the next several weeks increasingly challenging. A prep for the school year, perhaps?

The days and time I work at my boss’ house will be altered, with me working later than normal. My later hours will require my husband to alter his work schedule, ensuring the kids are picked up in time from daycare. And, because my days and hours will be altered, the time at home to tackle chores will be discombobulated. None of the above discombobulations (new word) are earth shattering, but the discombobulations will leave me feeling out of balance. I mean, hello?! Where on earth (or in a closet) will I find time to consume a pint of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream? When will I have time to eat a bag of Pirate’s Booty chips? And, when will I have time to cut my hair out of stress?! Seriously, folks. Next week, the mythical beast called ‘Balance’ will be blown to smithereens. [With the assumption that ‘Balance’ is a girl, I insert ‘A Girl Like You‘ or ‘Behind the Wall of Sleep‘ by the Smithereens here.]

As I brace for the impact of next week, becoming more involved in this new phase of life, I wonder how my family and I will keep it together. How often are you suppose to change the bed sheets and bathroom towels? Is it OK to recycle your underwear, as the laundry becomes backlogged? How dark can the ring around the toilet bowl get before it is considered gross? And, I have to attempt to find balance? Really? Not going to happen. Searching for ‘balance’ only leads to frustration. In fact, I think finding the Loch Ness monster would prove to be an easier find than balance. I hear Scotland is quite lovely this time of year; however, I won’t try to fit that trip into my schedule. After all, we have money to save, tasks to tackle and junk food to crave.

P.S. I have another pint of Ben & Jerry’s in the freezer: Stephen Colbert’s Americone Dream. Look, it was on sale 2 for $5. I had to buy two. And yes, you’ll find me eating the entire pint in the closet tomorrow, after having just registered my son for Kindergarten.

Reality meeting Reality

~ Lenore Diane ~ 1 Comment

First, I finished month-end billing. This matters to you, I know. And, because I have finished month end billing, I feel a weight has been lifted. Woo hoo! Just in time for the weekend. Second, I found the source of my fear and anxiety.

The Log Lodge Bunch and Grandpa Bob

See the picture? This is the Log Lodge Bunch in the Spring of 2007. See the cute kid in front with a green shirt and wearing glasses? Yeah, that kid. That’s my oldest son, Joe. Joe starts kindergarten in August this year. See the the dark haired girl holding a baby? Yeah, that baby is my kid, too. That’s Charlie, who is turning 4 in June. The only kids in the picture that are still part of the Log Lodge crew are Joe and Charlie. The others have moved on to ‘big kid’ school.

I can handle my boys getting older. Truly. I do not have a sense of fear or anxiety with the thought and realization that they are getting older. However, see the lady in the picture? That’s our daycare provider, Suzann. The thought that my boys are getting to the age where they will leave Suzann’s place is making me crazy with fear and anxiety. (I’ll write about Suzann soon. She is an incredible person.)

I have my feet on the ground. Yes, though my head can be found in the clouds frequently throughout the day, I believe I have a pretty good grip of reality. [Oh, keep quiet Peanut Gallery. Thanks.] And, I have been well aware of the fact that my boys will one day go to school. I guess what I failed to grasp was how our life would change drastically once they started school and are dictated by the school calendar.

This morning, the boys and I sat on the couch sipping our soy milk and coffee, while watching Curious George. (Straight black coffee for me, and straight soy milk for the boys.) When he is not working at home, Rob leaves for the office before the kids and I get out of bed. Charlie and I didn’t stumble out of our rooms until 7AM. Joe joined us on the couch around 7:15. And, we sat. We chatted about George and the man in the yellow hat, and we discussed the different ways a person can get dressed. For instance, Charlie likes to get fully undressed and sit a minute before moving forward with dressing. Once ready to get dressed, Charlie likes to put on his socks first, followed by underwear, pants and shirt. While Joe prefers taking one item of clothing off at a time, replacing it with a clean item. For example, he takes his shirt off, and he puts on a clean shirt, etc. We cover some serious issues in the morning.

I enjoy the fact that our weekday mornings move in a slow and casual pace, because where we have to go in the morning does not come with a time constraint. Yes, the boys were going to Suzann’s house; and yes, I needed to go to my boss’ house; but, there was no bell that was going to ring, indicating we were late. Sometimes we have to step up the slow pace due to appointments, but generally speaking – our weekday mornings are similar to weekend mornings: slow, comfortable and casual.

All of this is going to change come August 2010. Joe will have to get up earlier, eat breakfast and head to school before the bell rings. Charlie and I will no longer get to sit with Joe, casually enjoying the morning. We will no longer get to play impromptu games of Hi-Ho Cherry-O or Chutes and Ladders. (OK, so I won’t miss those impromptu games.) We will no longer be able to stumble out of bed at 7AM or 7:15AM. And, in another year, Charlie will be waking up earlier, eating breakfast and making sure he gets to school before the bell rings.

I am going to miss my quiet and casual time with the boys. And, because I work, I will miss the freedom and flexibility with my work hours. I’ve yet to sit and talk about it with my boss, but my availability with regards to work is going to be compromised. Like many working Moms before me, I will now have the responsibility of picking Joe up from school in the middle of my workday. And, come school holiday time, I will have to juggle having Joe home while meeting my paid-gig responsibilities. The short holidays won’t pose a huge problem, but I’m not sure how the whole “Summer break” is going to pan out for us.

Again, I know I am not the first Mom to come to this stage of reality, and I won’t be the last Mom that faces this stage of reality. I also know this is not a huge deal in the scheme of things. Yet, I am a little bummed and overcome with a bit of fear and anxiety for the pending reality. I quite enjoy my current reality, especially the indigo skies and sunflower lined roads. Oh wait. Sorry. I confused my reality with fantasy, or is it I confused my fantasy with reality? Anyway, as I was saying, I love the slow pace of mornings in my house. And, I am sad this reality is coming to an end. However, until my current reality meets my new reality, I will definitely milk the remaining 4 months I have left to sit and enjoy the casual morning time with the boys. [Oh, and I’ll enjoy the cups of coffee, too. Love me some fresh brewed coffee in the morning!]