What is it about you?

Today’s commentary is brought to you by my parents. Thanks to my parents, I have picked up many idiosyncrasies and/or obsessions. For instance, today I mowed the lawn. And, thanks to my parents, I mow the lawn in a different direction each week. This morning, I had to mow in the up/down direction (vs. side to side).

I’ve talked about mowing the lawn in previous posts. My parents always mowed the lawn in different directions. And now, I cannot bring myself to mow the lawn in the same direction every time. This obsession stinks, because we have a hill in the front yard and a hill in the backyard. I do not enjoy the days I have to mow up and down the hills; mowing side to side is much easier.

One morning, while I was mowing the lawn (up/down) our neighbor, Ed, walked by our house. Apparently, due to my red face and slow pace, he could tell I was not having an easy time. I noticed he stopped walking, so I looked over to see what he was doing. He was making a side to side motion, letting me know side to side would be easier than up/down. I stopped the mower. “I blame my parents.” I huffed. I didn’t huff because I was mad; I huffed because I was tired.

“My parents always mowed in a different direction.” I explained to Ed.

“You need to get over that.” He said.

“Well, it’s the only exercise I get. It’s not so bad.”

He smiled and said, “Join a gym.” Then he started walking again, and I started the mower and resumed my obsession.

Rearranging furniture is another quirk about me that I believe comes from my parents. Well, my Dad didn’t rearrange furniture, but my Mom sure did. And, I rearrange a room in our house about once every two months. The boys have come to accept my habit of rearranging to the point that they will ask me to rearrange certain rooms. In fact, Charlie recently asked me to rearrange the kitchen. Unfortunately, the kitchen is pretty much nailed down. Aside from rearranging the counter-top, the kitchen will remain ‘as is’.

Another idiosyncrasy I possess relates to my Dad’s smoking habit, though I do not smoke. When smoking and driving, my Dad would rest his elbow on the car door, while holding a cigarette between two fingers and having the tip of his thumb in his mouth. When I am driving in the car, I catch myself in the same kind of pose my Dad had when he was smoking and driving.

Like my Dad, I also possess wrinkles around my mouth and lines on my forehead. (I realize wrinkles and facial lines aren’t considered an idiosyncrasy.) The wrinkles were more noticeable on my Dad’s Mom, as well was my Dad’s sister, though my Dad had the wrinkles, too. And, I speak in past tense, though my Dad’s sister is still very much alive. (My Dad and his Mom died 16yrs ago. *gasp!* Still seems like yesterday on some days.)

I think the wrinkles around the mouth stem from worrying. “Her pursed lips showed concern and frustration.”  Yes, my lips are in a constant state of ‘pursedness’, as I simultaneously raise my eyebrows in concern and shock, creating lines on my forehead…

Our parents pass down more than genes. They pass down habits, addictions, obsessions, idiosyncrasies, looks, etc. And no, we don’t necessarily welcome everything they pass down to us. Still, what is it about you that resembles your parents?

I feel my Dad’s presence every time I catch myself in the ‘cigarette’ pose. When I look in the mirror with pursed lips, I see my Dad in my reflection. Then I raise my eyebrows and see his same lined forehead. As I sit and scoot on my butt, dragging a dresser across the floor, I laugh to myself and wonder where my Mom would put the dresser this time. Though I may curse my parents when it comes time to mow the lawn in the up/down direction, I quite enjoy their presence in other things.

The Troubles with Charlie

Cute + Charming + Curious = The Troubles with Charlie

We arrived at the Meet n’ Greet, which took place at the neighborhood clubhouse. It was a hot day in July, and the kids were promised a chance to swim. Unfortunately, the swimming was delayed due to a typical summertime thunderstorm. And, according to the life guard on duty, we had to stay out of the pool until 30 minutes had passed with no thunder.

Everyone was gathered in the small clubhouse, waiting out the storm. Though the kids were looking forward to swimming, they didn’t let the storms dampen their spirit. For two hours, the kids played happily indoors. I spent most of the time in a comfy chair, sitting with Joe, my 5yr old. He and I are people watchers. Rob was making his rounds, taking to heart the point of the ‘meet n’ greet’. And, Charlie, my 4yr old, was running around like Curious George, exploring any and all open doors, following the older kids all around, wooing them with his grin and staring out the windows watching the rain.

The rain and thunder did pass, shortly after we finished dinner. Once given the all clear, the kids darted out to the pool. Though Joe and Charlie are new to swimming, the two were quick to get into the pool. Joe chose to stay by the steps, while Charlie was ready to explore.

Clinging to the side of the pool, Charlie started to slide along, leaving the security of the steps. When he realized he cleared the steps, he let go of the wall and rolled on to his back, floating. I watched as he swam confidently on his back. The smile on his face made it clear he was enjoying himself. Suddenly, the once subtle waves became more intense as more kids entered the pool. Water was splashing onto Charlie’s face, and I could see his smile slowly turn to panic.

As Charlie’s panicking increased, he began to lose his bearings, which meant he no longer saw the wall. Charlie was within my arm’s reach, but rather than grab him – I bent down and tried to talk him through his fear. I told him to quiet his feet and let himself float. The waves and the splashing continued, and Charlie became more and more flustered. I admit, I was becoming a bit panicked, too.

I reached my hand out, in an attempt to grab Charlie and bring him back to the wall, but I couldn’t reach him. I turned around to Rob and said, “Get in and get him!” Rob had every intention of getting in with the boys, but he stayed back a bit, because we wanted the boys to try it out without ‘Daddy’.

Rob got a hold of Charlie and sat him on the side of the pool. Breathing a sigh of relief, I knelt beside Charlie and talked to him about what had just happened. I reminded him of the float position and keeping his feet quiet. Truthfully, Charlie wasn’t all that shaken up about it. I was the one that needed to breath into a paper bag. And, in less than five minutes, Charlie was standing up and asking Daddy to catch him as he jumped into the pool.

Charlie looking at the water under the 'temporarily closed' fountain

The rest of the evening, I watched Charlie slide along the wall of the pool to the deep end several times, letting go and swimming on his back all the way to the other side. I watched Charlie get to the point where he jumped into the pool by himself and swam to the steps, got out of the pool, jumped in again, etc. And, while I watched Charlie do all of this, I noticed Joe, staying in or near the shallow end, taking few risks and only jumping when Daddy was waiting for him in the pool.

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One of our house rules is that the boys cannot come out of their room before 7Am. I enjoy quiet mornings, so I make a point to wake up and have time to myself before the boys come out of their room. Well, the next morning, while I was reading a book and drinking my coffee before the 7AM ‘release’, I could hear Charlie in his bedroom. I heard him playing with his Lincoln logs, talking to his animals and singing. Though Joe came out of his room promptly at 7AM, Charlie remained in his room.

I got up off the couch and knocked on Charlie’s door, as I started to open it. When I opened the door, I found Charlie’s shorts drawer open and empty. He had scattered the shorts all around his room, looking for the perfect pair to wear. And, I found Charlie, standing on shelving in his closet, picking out the perfect shirt to wear with his perfect shorts.

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With Joe starting Kindergarten a week from today, Charlie will be the ‘big kid on campus’ at Suzann’s house. Charlie has been Joe’s shadow for most of his 4yrs. However, based upon his independent exploration at the Meet n’ Greet, Charlie is ready to spread his wings. Charlie is curious. Charlie is a doer. Charlie is an explorer. What’s worse – Charlie is a charmer. Charlie’s characteristics make me smile, perhaps nervously. I cannot help but wonder about my ‘potential’ troubles with Charlie.

Friday Fa La La

Earlier this week, when I dropped the boys off at Suzann’s house, I heard Joe ask, “Is Sissy still on vacation?” Suzann looked at me and said, “Sissy went on vacation.” Then she looked at Joe and answered, “Yes.” Because I didn’t know anyone by the name of Sissy, I was confused.

“Where did she go on vacation?” Joe asked. Suzann said, “She went to the Bahamas.” “Where are the Bahamas?” Joe asked. “Let’s get the map out and find it, Joe.” Suzann said, as she walked over to get the large map book.

As she passed me I asked, “Who is Sissy?” Suzann smiled and said, “Sissy is one of the doll house dolls.” She continued talking to me, while getting out the map. “Sissy has many friends in the classroom, and she was having a hard time spending time with everyone, so she decided to go on vacation.”

Joe interrupted, “When will she be back?” Suzann smiled, “I don’t know, Joe.” She answered. “Maybe we can write Sissy  letter.”

As I turned to leave, the kids were gathering around the large map book on the floor. I smiled, happy to know Sissy was getting a much needed vacation and the kids were exploring the world through her travels.

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Today as I walked to my mail box
I notice the holes in my socks.
I found a letter from you.
Did a ‘Skip to my Lou’
And said, “My husband sure rocks!”

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I went to the grocery store this week. While shopping for fresh produce, I decided to walk down the card aisle and pick up a card for a friend of mine. I love Hallmark’s Hoops & YoYo cards, so that is where I started my search for the perfect ‘Hello’ card.

Next to the Hoops & YoYo cards were Hallmark’s ‘Saturdays’ cards. As I glanced in the ‘Saturdays’ section, my heart sank. I found several cards labeled ‘Cancer’, ‘Recession’ and ‘Job Loss’. Wow. Immediately, I thought about those currently challenged with Cancer, the Recession and unemployment. And, of course, there are those challenged by other health, financial and life matters. I suppose Multiple Sclerosis, debt and foreclosure cards are right around the corner.

I’m not trying to make light of the cards or the challenges. I mean, I was there to buy a card for my friend, because her Mom is battling Cancer. I think the purpose of cards is to lighten the mood and lift up one’s spirit; yet, seeing the labels left me feeling depressed. In fact, I suddenly needed a mood lifter; so, I picked up one “Hoops & YoYo” card for my friend and one for me. Oh, and I stopped by the chocolate aisle, too.

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Young love is blossoming. Every day this week, my youngest has asked me to drive by McKinley’s house. McKinley is a girl in his daycare class. Yesterday, when I picked up the boys, Charlie came running out to me. “Mommy!” He exclaimed. “McKinley said I could come over to her house today!”

I looked at Suzann, who was bringing the boys out to the car, and I smiled. She and I have been watching Charlie’s love for McKinley grow for some time now. In fact, we exchanged numbers with McKinley’s parents earlier in the week. Then I looked at Charlie and asked, “Who said you could go to McKinley’s house – McKinley or her Mom?” Charlie said, “McKinley.”

Then Suzann said, “The two of them were discussing it during nap time.” “You know,” she continued with a wink, “pillow talk.”

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It’s the stuff I constantly seek.
Without it, I do surely shriek
But today I quiet the scream
For tonight I’ll enjoy ice cream
And abstain once again next week.

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It’s a brand new day, a gift to you.
A perfect time to say, “Woo hoo!”

Do something special, give it your best.
The gripes and the groans, give ’em a rest.

Here’s to your day, decide to be happy.
You’ve got the power, and I’ve got the sappy.

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