Round and round it goes; where it stops no one knows

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It’s risky. Me writing this late in the day. The caffeine that gave me the pleasant perk of the morning is long gone. The chipper moods of the kids have changed to cranky,  while my energy level slowly sinks with the setting sun. What makes me think I have the wherewithal to write now? Then again, what makes me think I have the wherewithal to write at all on any given day?

Tonight, right now, I write as an outlet. I need an outlet. Don’t we all need outlets of some sort? Typically, my outlet consists of the delicious dairy delight called ‘ice cream’. However, because I am determined to be ice cream free for 40 days, I do not want to pacify myself with the frozen delicacy. So, I write. [Day 8, by the way. I’ve gone 8 days so far.]

Today, when I picked up my oldest from Kindergarten, his teacher informed me he had an ‘incident’. Seems my child became upset about something, and he threw a peppercorn at one of the teachers. Sports aside, throwing something at someone is not acceptable. Now, add to the fact that the peppercorn thrown by my child got stuck in the teacher’s ear, and well my child did not win any awards today. It’s a shame the “Peppercorn Toss” was last week.

My oldest has a temper. I have written about his temper in previous posts. And, as I have also mentioned previously, he gets his temper from me. My reaction to his behavior today was embarrassment at first. After quickly overcoming the embarrassment, I was sad. A temper is a horrible waste of energy, and the damage that a temper can cause is extensive. I don’t want a temper filled life for either of my boys. And, I hope this isn’t an indication of things to come.

I remind myself that my son is only five years old, as if there is an acceptable age to throw things. I tell myself that the art of peppercorn tossing is underrated. And, I doubt my son would be able to throw the peppercorn in the teacher’s ear, if he were to try again. Unless she is a TWEOUS, Teachers with ears of unusual size. But I digress. Oh, and before I forget, the peppercorn was successfully removed from the TWEOUS’ ear.

My son was punished for throwing the peppercorn. When we came home from school, he went to his room, where he spent the rest of the day. And, he wrote a letter to the teacher saying he was sorry for what happened. He lost a few other privileges as well, in hopes we drove the point home, without throwing him for a loop. (HA! Sorry, a little throw humor.)

The hardest part about tonight was my son’s frustration, once home. Upset he was banished to his room, he took the opportunity to yell a little, cry a little and pound a little. Okay, okay, so he did all of the above more than just a little. The thing that got me was his yelling, “Why don’t you love me?” “Why don’t you like me?” He was breaking my heart. And again, I remind myself he is only five years old. Wait. Five years old?! Why is he saying stuff like this at five years old? Where’s the ice cream. I need some ice cream.

After supper, things started settling down, well things settled some, okay things settled a little – okay fine, the banished one was still upset. I phoned a friend, and I started to tell her about my day. When I mentioned what the banished one had done, she laughed and said, “Oh, just wait. You’ll be able to laugh about this soon.” Then I heard crying on her end of the phone, causing her to ask “What happened?” She let me know that one of her kids had just kicked the other kid. And, we laughed. Laughter sure beats ice cream, at least calorically speaking. Peppercorns anyone?

One of the Hardest Parts of the Job

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Dear Blogary,

I need to vent, please. Yesterday afternoon, I told my son he had to stay in his room, because he did not follow directions. Though I repeated the directions a second time (with the ‘staying in your room’ warning), he decided to throw a toy at me and not comply with the directions.

Blogary, I haven’t a clue where he gets his temper. Oh wait. Yeah. That would be from me. Thanks.

I told my 5yr old he could come out of his room once everything was picked up and put away. Though fits could be heard through the shut door, he did complete the task. When he came out of his room, he went to the kitchen, where Daddy and Charlie were making pancakes for supper.

“Daddy, will you make me some chick’n nuggets?” Joe asked. (Point of fact: We eat soy nuggets. VeggiePatch brand. Quite tasty!)

Daddy said “No.” With Daddy’s response, down went Joe with another fit flare-up. Joe claimed we asked Charlie what he wanted for supper, but we did not ask Joe. Blah, blah, blah, Blogary. And, no, we did not ask Charlie what he wanted for supper.

While Joe is in the midst of another fit, I will share with you, Blogary – Joe misses his naps. He has not adjusted to a full day of school without a nap. Last Monday was another example of several melt-downs, triggered by exhaustion. I am quite confident, Blogary, Joe’s behavior last night was directly tied to a weekend of fun, followed by a full day on Monday with no ‘down time’.

Anyway, Joe’s fit continued. “Joe.” I said. “Get up, and go back to your room.”

“No!” He said.

“Joe. Get up now, and go to your room, or you will go to bed without supper.”

Blogary, I knew Joe was tired, but I also knew this kind of behavior needed to be addressed. This kind of behavior is – to quote Super Nanny – “Unacceptable.”

Again, Joe said ‘no’. So, I got hold of his arm, stood him up and started walking him to his room. As we passed the fridge, he took his other hand and brushed off the magnets and pictures in a huff. I stopped.

“Joe. Pick those up.” Blogary, you already know what Joe’s response was, eh?

“Joe,” I continue, because he said ‘no’. “You will pick them up now, or you will go straight to your room when you get home from school tomorrow.”

Cue Joe’s response: “No.”

“Joe. I’m setting the timer. You will pick up the mess and get to your room before the timer goes off or you will go to bed without supper tomorrow, too.” Too much perhaps, Blogary?! Meh.

Crying, Joe started to clean up and head to his room. And, he stayed in his room the rest of the day. Though, that was not the last we heard of Joe, as he continued pitching fits in the privacy of his own room.

Blogary, at one point, I went to Joe’s room, letting him know there would be consequences if he continued to slam the door on his captain’s bed. Then I went back to join Daddy and Charlie at the dinner table, with dinner already in progress.

As I sat down, I smiled at Rob and said, “Have I earned an excuse to drive to P-U-B-L-I-X?” (Publix is a grocery store chain that sells Ben &  Jerry’s S’mores ice cream. And, I spelled it, because Charlie would understand what I was wanting.)

Rob smiled back at me and said, “Not only have you earned it. Your ‘Gopher’ will gladly go get it for you.”

Now please understand, I am not trying to say that I earned ice cream because I reprimanded and punished my child. The purpose of getting the ice cream was to calm my frazzled nerves. I don’t know a Mom in the world that enjoys hearing their child pitch fits. And, in my opinion, whether the fit is warranted or not – the crying and sadness tugs at my heartstrings. I’ve heard the saying several times, “You are only as happy as your unhappiest child.” Well, my child was not happy last night, I was not happy last night, and ice cream could have served as a numbing agent (for both of us, actually).

Joe eventually calmed down and fell asleep, and I worked my way through the emotions without resorting to food. This morning, Joe and I started the day fresh. He will go straight to his room when he gets home from school. However, he will be invited to join the family at the dinner table for supper. I don’t want to go through two nights (in a row) of missed dinners.

Anyway, thanks for listening, Blogary.

Love,
Me