What is it about you?

Today’s commentary is brought to you by my parents. Thanks to my parents, I have picked up many idiosyncrasies and/or obsessions. For instance, today I mowed the lawn. And, thanks to my parents, I mow the lawn in a different direction each week. This morning, I had to mow in the up/down direction (vs. side to side).

I’ve talked about mowing the lawn in previous posts. My parents always mowed the lawn in different directions. And now, I cannot bring myself to mow the lawn in the same direction every time. This obsession stinks, because we have a hill in the front yard and a hill in the backyard. I do not enjoy the days I have to mow up and down the hills; mowing side to side is much easier.

One morning, while I was mowing the lawn (up/down) our neighbor, Ed, walked by our house. Apparently, due to my red face and slow pace, he could tell I was not having an easy time. I noticed he stopped walking, so I looked over to see what he was doing. He was making a side to side motion, letting me know side to side would be easier than up/down. I stopped the mower. “I blame my parents.” I huffed. I didn’t huff because I was mad; I huffed because I was tired.

“My parents always mowed in a different direction.” I explained to Ed.

“You need to get over that.” He said.

“Well, it’s the only exercise I get. It’s not so bad.”

He smiled and said, “Join a gym.” Then he started walking again, and I started the mower and resumed my obsession.

Rearranging furniture is another quirk about me that I believe comes from my parents. Well, my Dad didn’t rearrange furniture, but my Mom sure did. And, I rearrange a room in our house about once every two months. The boys have come to accept my habit of rearranging to the point that they will ask me to rearrange certain rooms. In fact, Charlie recently asked me to rearrange the kitchen. Unfortunately, the kitchen is pretty much nailed down. Aside from rearranging the counter-top, the kitchen will remain ‘as is’.

Another idiosyncrasy I possess relates to my Dad’s smoking habit, though I do not smoke. When smoking and driving, my Dad would rest his elbow on the car door, while holding a cigarette between two fingers and having the tip of his thumb in his mouth. When I am driving in the car, I catch myself in the same kind of pose my Dad had when he was smoking and driving.

Like my Dad, I also possess wrinkles around my mouth and lines on my forehead. (I realize wrinkles and facial lines aren’t considered an idiosyncrasy.) The wrinkles were more noticeable on my Dad’s Mom, as well was my Dad’s sister, though my Dad had the wrinkles, too. And, I speak in past tense, though my Dad’s sister is still very much alive. (My Dad and his Mom died 16yrs ago. *gasp!* Still seems like yesterday on some days.)

I think the wrinkles around the mouth stem from worrying. “Her pursed lips showed concern and frustration.”  Yes, my lips are in a constant state of ‘pursedness’, as I simultaneously raise my eyebrows in concern and shock, creating lines on my forehead…

Our parents pass down more than genes. They pass down habits, addictions, obsessions, idiosyncrasies, looks, etc. And no, we don’t necessarily welcome everything they pass down to us. Still, what is it about you that resembles your parents?

I feel my Dad’s presence every time I catch myself in the ‘cigarette’ pose. When I look in the mirror with pursed lips, I see my Dad in my reflection. Then I raise my eyebrows and see his same lined forehead. As I sit and scoot on my butt, dragging a dresser across the floor, I laugh to myself and wonder where my Mom would put the dresser this time. Though I may curse my parents when it comes time to mow the lawn in the up/down direction, I quite enjoy their presence in other things.

An Escape

She could hear the rumble of thunder in the distance. Another summer thunderstorm was brewing, triggered by the hot and humid day. She snuggled herself closer, finding comfort in him. She smiled and nudged him, as he wrapped his arms around her.

“Are you ready for tonight?” She asked. “Oh, let’s not talk about tonight, right now.” He said, pulling her closer. “I was hoping we could just enjoy this moment.” She smiled. She was enjoying this moment, as well as the countless other moments of the weekend. She hated that they were heading back tonight.

He surprised her on Thursday, walking into her office unannounced. “We’re leaving.” He said. Startled, she felt her face get warm as she blushed. She had met him only 3 months ago, and the chemistry between the two of them was intense. Lust? Certainly; still, the love was undeniable.

“Our flight leaves in two hours, giving us just enough time to get to the airport and board the plane.” He informed her. “But, what about work?” She asked. She didn’t care a thing about work, but she felt the need to question him a little. “Forget about work. I am taking you away so we can marvel at each other without interruption.” He said with a smile. She laughed. He was a true romantic, but it was his sense of humor she loved most. Well, she loved his hands, too.

Within 4hrs, they had reached a secluded cottage on the shoreline. She remembered how the cottage was set up when they walked in the door: candles, fresh fruit and wine.

The wind picked up, as the thunder grew louder. She stood up, and walked to the bay window, watching the storm approach. He walked over to her. “Maybe the storm will delay the flight.” He said, as he began to run his fingers through her hair. She loved how he played with her hair. “Mmm..” she said. “That would be just terrible.”

She felt a blaze across her dress, as he reached and turned her around to face him. He started kissing her neck, and she heard herself sigh. She placed her hands on his face and brought his soft lips to hers. His hands slid down her back, unzipping her dress.

“The flight.” She moaned. “We’ll catch another one.” He whispered. Her legs became weak, as he looked into her eyes and smiled.  Slowly, he brushed her dress off each shoulder causing it to fall to the floor. She closed her eyes as he started to caress her . . . “Mom! Joe just flushed my wubba nub down the toilet!” And, I’m back. Closing the book, I return to my life as a Mom.

The Troubles with Charlie

Cute + Charming + Curious = The Troubles with Charlie

We arrived at the Meet n’ Greet, which took place at the neighborhood clubhouse. It was a hot day in July, and the kids were promised a chance to swim. Unfortunately, the swimming was delayed due to a typical summertime thunderstorm. And, according to the life guard on duty, we had to stay out of the pool until 30 minutes had passed with no thunder.

Everyone was gathered in the small clubhouse, waiting out the storm. Though the kids were looking forward to swimming, they didn’t let the storms dampen their spirit. For two hours, the kids played happily indoors. I spent most of the time in a comfy chair, sitting with Joe, my 5yr old. He and I are people watchers. Rob was making his rounds, taking to heart the point of the ‘meet n’ greet’. And, Charlie, my 4yr old, was running around like Curious George, exploring any and all open doors, following the older kids all around, wooing them with his grin and staring out the windows watching the rain.

The rain and thunder did pass, shortly after we finished dinner. Once given the all clear, the kids darted out to the pool. Though Joe and Charlie are new to swimming, the two were quick to get into the pool. Joe chose to stay by the steps, while Charlie was ready to explore.

Clinging to the side of the pool, Charlie started to slide along, leaving the security of the steps. When he realized he cleared the steps, he let go of the wall and rolled on to his back, floating. I watched as he swam confidently on his back. The smile on his face made it clear he was enjoying himself. Suddenly, the once subtle waves became more intense as more kids entered the pool. Water was splashing onto Charlie’s face, and I could see his smile slowly turn to panic.

As Charlie’s panicking increased, he began to lose his bearings, which meant he no longer saw the wall. Charlie was within my arm’s reach, but rather than grab him – I bent down and tried to talk him through his fear. I told him to quiet his feet and let himself float. The waves and the splashing continued, and Charlie became more and more flustered. I admit, I was becoming a bit panicked, too.

I reached my hand out, in an attempt to grab Charlie and bring him back to the wall, but I couldn’t reach him. I turned around to Rob and said, “Get in and get him!” Rob had every intention of getting in with the boys, but he stayed back a bit, because we wanted the boys to try it out without ‘Daddy’.

Rob got a hold of Charlie and sat him on the side of the pool. Breathing a sigh of relief, I knelt beside Charlie and talked to him about what had just happened. I reminded him of the float position and keeping his feet quiet. Truthfully, Charlie wasn’t all that shaken up about it. I was the one that needed to breath into a paper bag. And, in less than five minutes, Charlie was standing up and asking Daddy to catch him as he jumped into the pool.

Charlie looking at the water under the 'temporarily closed' fountain

The rest of the evening, I watched Charlie slide along the wall of the pool to the deep end several times, letting go and swimming on his back all the way to the other side. I watched Charlie get to the point where he jumped into the pool by himself and swam to the steps, got out of the pool, jumped in again, etc. And, while I watched Charlie do all of this, I noticed Joe, staying in or near the shallow end, taking few risks and only jumping when Daddy was waiting for him in the pool.

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One of our house rules is that the boys cannot come out of their room before 7Am. I enjoy quiet mornings, so I make a point to wake up and have time to myself before the boys come out of their room. Well, the next morning, while I was reading a book and drinking my coffee before the 7AM ‘release’, I could hear Charlie in his bedroom. I heard him playing with his Lincoln logs, talking to his animals and singing. Though Joe came out of his room promptly at 7AM, Charlie remained in his room.

I got up off the couch and knocked on Charlie’s door, as I started to open it. When I opened the door, I found Charlie’s shorts drawer open and empty. He had scattered the shorts all around his room, looking for the perfect pair to wear. And, I found Charlie, standing on shelving in his closet, picking out the perfect shirt to wear with his perfect shorts.

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With Joe starting Kindergarten a week from today, Charlie will be the ‘big kid on campus’ at Suzann’s house. Charlie has been Joe’s shadow for most of his 4yrs. However, based upon his independent exploration at the Meet n’ Greet, Charlie is ready to spread his wings. Charlie is curious. Charlie is a doer. Charlie is an explorer. What’s worse – Charlie is a charmer. Charlie’s characteristics make me smile, perhaps nervously. I cannot help but wonder about my ‘potential’ troubles with Charlie.